fall fun

It finally feels like fall, i.e., I'm freezing every morning now. So let's recap on all the "autumnal" fun we had when it was like 85 degrees out. This year we managed a pumpkin patch AND Apple Hill with the whole family. The last few years, it's been just me and the kids or we've skipped altogether due to being too busy.

We started at Boa Vista Orchards by accident because I thought it was the place I took the kids last year. It was not. This is not a you-pick orchard, it is very crowded because it is right off the main road. However, if you like crafty stuff and lots of apple-related product, it is the place for you.

So then, thankfully, Tana answered my text and told me that it was Delfino Farms, which was nearby and we headed that way. Delfino is quiet and lovely. They have hard cider and these amazing little creations called the walking apple pie. I'm not entirely sure why Gus did not get ice cream with ours, but you should definitely get the ice cream.

Delfino is also not a you-pick orchard, and therefore we had to make a third stop. Denver Dan's. Where we picked so many apples that we still have them in our fridge, and despite this fact, Gus went to the grocery store and bought apples for whatever reason. Anyway, this place is the best. The people that work there are so nice. My kids loved running around and reading the signs so they knew what kind they were picking. To be fair, we may or may not have picked our apples based purely on name and not on description.

We also managed a trip to Fog Willow pumpkin farm. J1 had her 5th birthday there, after which they gave her a free membership, that we have never used until now. And really, the only reason we went was because J2 had a birthday party to attend.

We're still balls deep, literally, in soccer. Fall is not over ... but I feel I have now met my parental obligation.

here's what i know ...

This has taken awhile and been hard to write. I spent a sleepless, anxious week at the end of September holding my breath, waiting to say a final goodbye to a great man. I'm back to sleeping and eating for the most part, but it catches you when you least expect. There are moments in the early morning when I wake up feeling something sitting on my chest (and no, it's not J2) remembering that he won't be there to meet us at the boathouse anymore.

In the weeks since my dad has passed, here's what I have learned ...

First, my dad was an extremely impressive man. Some of the things said in his obituary, I had not even been aware of, which definitely adds to the sadness because the opportunity to talk with him about those things is gone. J1 told me that she wished Papa Roger had told her all those things so that she could be happy for him while he was alive. I certainly would have been interested in his research in medical school. Tana said that after reading his obituary she understands me a little more---my work ethic, my drive to succeed, my unwillingess to let those I love down, at times to my own detriment. You see it in J1, as well.

Second, I feel like I understand him a bit more. Academics were always so important in our household. When I got straight As, dad would joke that my report card was boring. But if there was anything less than all As, he wanted to know why. When I started looking at colleges, he told me I could go wherever I wanted. When I left for college, he told me that for every hour I was in class, I needed to spend two hours studying. My senior year he drove the 4 hours to Carleton to see me present my comps. When I passed the bar exam, he sat through the really really long ceremony to see me get sworn into the Minnesota Bar. He rarely ever said the words, "I'm proud of you," but I guess he wouldn't have done all those things, if he wasn't.

Law School graduation

Admitted to the MN Bar

Third, I have the best friends. Beth took care of my ass for most of the week I was in Minnesota, making sure I ate something even if all I wanted was vodka, Canelake's and Dairy Queen. I wouldn't have survived that week without her, her two wonderful boys, and 1/2 price admission to the Hockey Hall of Fame. Thank you to everyone who supported my family during this time. The outpouring of love was overwhelming. And thanks to my brother for paying the bar tab ... TWICE. Not to be outdone by their Minnesota counterparts, my California crew held their own. Rides to the airport, standing in for me at J2's birthday party, regular check-ins throughout the week. You ladies know you are my ride or dies.

see, we went!

Fourth, I would not want to work for any other firm. We're busy. We work hard. But we are also understanding, compassionate, and most of all, a family. No one batted an eyelash when I said I needed to be gone all week and assured me that everything would be taken care of.

Finally, riding roller coasters at MOA kind of hungover is not cool. But you do it. Because you're a mom. And moms are badass AF.

The fact that I was able to get this all down finally is a sign that I'm healing, but not being able to say goodbye to him is still what haunts me most. We will continue to play cribbage, blow things up, enjoy the lake, smoke cigars, play golf and all the other things that Dr. B. liked to do. Except, I probs will not be drinking chardonnay (barf). Cheers, Dad. You were the greatest man. I love you so much.

this one is for Dave

keep it simple

Summer has been flying by in a whirlwind of swim meets, soccer tournaments, and all the practices that come along with it. Two hotter than Hades days of 12+ hours of swim meetings (my new favorite J2-ism), and I was feeling some mom-burnout. I needed a timeout. So, we took one.

Gus was working in Oakland on a Friday. It was a spur of the moment decision to join him and have a quick overnight. In the past, since our time sans kids is so few and far between, I've tried to make everything perfect, find the best hotel, the best restaurant---thus, losing sight of the fact that the whole point is just to spend some time together. Not this time. Honestly, this time I would have stayed in a Holiday Inn Express (provided it was clean) in Emeryville. My only real objective was to sleep without J2's feet in my face or J2 laying across the foot of the bed like a little puppy, and have an uninterrupted adult conversation with my husband.

We ended up in Berkeley. I just didn't have the time to find the best place, nor did I want to read about all the best places and then somehow feel disappointed that I didn't go there. I took the train from Sacramento. Gus met me at the train station and we were off for a little less than 24 kid-free hours. We wandered in upon a Mexican restaurant that had the best margaritas I think I ever had. And the Oaxacan chocolate budino ... the perfect, not too sweet ending.

We drank Peronis and ate Sour Patch kids in bed while watching Food Network. A completely mundane evening that had me thrilled to pieces.

The next morning we slept in, watched some HGTV, had breakfast at Berkeley Social Club (highly recommend!), wandered around a farmer's market, shopped on 4th Street, and made a quick stop at Off Fifth to score a few deals. 

this was the best espresso martin---EVER.

 

It was simple. It was perfect. Oh yeah, until we totaled our car. We are all safe, which is the most important thing, but HEAVY SIGH.

thanks for the love, minnesota

We spent the first week in July on our annual pilgrimage to the homeland. I would venture to say it was one of the best trips home that we've ever had. I'm not sure what it was that made it so magical, but I'm happy to give it a shot.

Drove by my childhood home.

The weather was absolutely perfect. Except for that first night when it was so rainy and windy that the waves sunk my parents' boat, which I managed to sleep through.

We had a little family reunion with aunts, cousins, and kids of cousins. It feels like a long time since we've all been in the same place at the same time.

I saw both of my brothers, and forced them to take pictures with  me.

The kids got to spend some time with Uncle Charlie. The kids don't personally know anyone who smokes, so they were pretty fascinated, and had lots of questions, as well as pointing out that he should probably not do it. LOL.

He also took them fishing. He was so good with them, helping them bait the hook, cast, and take the fish off. Even Gus, who has never caught a fish in Lake Vermilion despite nearly 12 years of trying, managed to snag a bass.

I didn't swim 2.2 miles across a freezing cold lake. But, J1 got some swimming pointers from one of my favorites, Ms. Oz, and she got to help hand out medals to those who did swim across the freezing cold lake. Maybe next year we do a Gordy Rodby memorial swim. Any takers?

I saw lots of friends. Gus in all his social media fame, courtesy of yours truly, even got recognized by a former classmate at the liquor store.

J2 made some new "friends."

Sorry, Eli.

And, sorry Matthew.

Also after the fishing incident mentioned above J2 declared he was a vegetarian and I spent the rest of the vacation assuring him that his hot dog, bacon, chicken, and hamburger were indeed made out of vegetarian meat. I'm totally OK if he wants to be a vegetarian, but I was just not prepared for it on that vacation and had not stocked up on plant-based provisions. That said, when we arrived back in Sacramento and I was fully committed to purchasing him some plant-based meat, he decided that he'd go back to being an omnivore.

J1 got to enjoy her favorite holiday, 4th of July. When questioned as to why it was her favorite, I found out it is because she loves the parade and seeing so much family. Those are pretty good reasons, if you ask me.

The kids had lots of time with Uncle David.

J2 snuck into good old, EGHS. He said he got out before the security cameras caught him. LOL.

We even let Gus visit a friend or two.

It was a wonderful trip. At one point, I realized that I was so relaxed that my neck didn't even hurt. I am back at work, and unfortunately, it's back to hurting. It was nice while it lasted though.

Thanks, Minnesota. We'll see you next summer!